Jillian, what are you doing to me?!

So, today, I started the 8 week Body Revolution video of Jillian Michaels'. I seem to have misplaced one of my 3 pound weights, so I'm stuck with my 8 pounders which hurt like fucking hell. Which sounds like an exaggeration, but the thing I've always been the most "meh" about is that I can't hold my arms up for shit. In high school, I could never even lift the bars on the machines. I half-ass some things because I feel like I might injure myself if I push it too hard with them, so hopefully if I push myself a little more each day I should be good. My little "push" is dedicated to getting my ass kicked by rolfball on Sunday. I worked so many muscles, I was achey and I realized I missed not being able to sit or move from my intense workouts. So here I go again.

By the way, I'd like to point out that I have fat abs here! I'm excited that the infrequent but effective exercises I've done since my full on attempt 1.5 years ago has left some definition there. Mostly, I just want to be less wide. I'd be okay with not technically being "skinny" again, but can I not be lumpy? That's all I want. No lumps, giant ass. Come on, let's werk. Squats for DAYS!

So here's Day 1. I figure if it's 8 weeks, I'll post an update at 4 weeks and again at 8 when I'm finished so we can see how this went. Today I had queso dip, 1/3 bag of popcorn, & a quesadilla. My lunch break at work was virtually non-existent but at least I got to eat something. 

Positives of the last couple of days: I am seeing a light of the end of the tunnel, with the payments of my first $1k in hospital bills almost being paid off and being almost half paid off on both credit cards, I'm starting to breathe a bit easier. Hopefully this time next year, I'll finally be in a new job and I'll have the ability to find SOME way to go back to school with a practical skill.

In the meantime, I'm reading and re-reading. I downloaded a million free books from iBooks, HOWEVER, I haven't gotten "Gone Girl" out of my mind since reading it over 6 months ago. I found a parody book today, and now I'm reading that AND re-reading "Gone Girl". I can't tell you yet if "So Far Gone, Girl" is as hilarious as it promises, but you can guarantee that I'll let you know.